It was supposed to be a routine stroll through Albertson's on a Sunday night. I was there for a few items, and a few items only: onions, zucchini, bell peppers, olive oil, milk. No frills, no gratuities.
Suddenly, there they were: Entenmann's chocolate-covered donuts. It hit me in the gut, right off the bat. Just from the picture on the box, I could already feel them sliding sweetly into my mouth. A voice cried out in my head. "Aw, whaddaya need those for?" it said pointedly. "You know you're only gonna eat one and then you're gonna be sick." Maybe so. Maybe it would only be a foolish waste of my money. But it was too late to turn back. I'd already tasted their fluffy goodness in my head, and I'd be damned if I let caution stop me now. I picked them up and threw them in my cart.
Finally, after a scrumptious dinner of black bean soup, I opened the box. With trepidation, I grabbed the first donut. It was just as I'd hoped: soft, tangy, expansive, sugary. Thrilled by having read my appetite so successfully, I reached for a second one. It was then that I began losing momentum. The voice inside my head was right; I couldn't even eat two of these things. Midway through the second donut, I maxed out.
The refrigerator came through, in the clutch, to save the day.
Just discovered the site ladiesof280.com (who also use this same blogging apparatus), I think it's my new favorite site, sarcasm and 280 never looked so beautiful!
ReplyDeleteClassic glazed or maple bars > chocolate.
ReplyDeleteHaha, I just checked out the ladiesof280. What a website and what a freeway! It's so much nicer than 101, but for some reason I feel a certain connection to the human race while driving 101 that's absent on 280. As Nietzsche says, you can only breathe that rarefied air for a little while before you have to climb back down the ladder.
ReplyDeleteHow do I define a Lady of 280...
ReplyDeleteShe's that special kind of lady...the kind who lets you pass between 84 and 92 and doesn't even raise a fuss...the kind who glances at you in her rear-view mirror every time you pass the Junipero Serra statue...
She's a soccer mom from Hillsborough. She's a lonely widow from Menlo Park. She's a teenager from San Bruno with a brand new license.
Often imitated, never duplicated...
The Ladies of 280.
I really enjoy the 'Sad Saturn' comment:
ReplyDelete"...she longs for her ex-boyfriend in Chicago, a place where there is no 280. Whoa, I just spent a moment pondering a 280-less existence ... how mundane... I think this Lof280 needs a lesson in how much greener your grass is sometimes. Actually, I think we all do. Take a look at your grass. Right now. Yeah, I thought so."
Yeah, they've definitely got their style down pretty sweet, but they don't seem very active, do they (only four posts in 2006)? What they lack in prolificacy they make up for in focus though.
ReplyDelete(Zrbo, regarding our earlier conversation: donut threads are exactly the kind that are OK to hijack. You judged well!)